Gist: Guardian Life, Inasonki, Jay O Suave and JoJo Abot

Actually I could not think of a better title because it’s way passed my bed time and I am determined to update this blog today, by fire, by force and holy water …*adjusts glasses*

First of all, your girl now writes for Guardian Life magazine woohoooo!!!! Every Sunday, make sure you grab a copy of the Guardian Newspaper (300 naira only) to take out the lifestyle mag and see what I’ve been up to. For those of you outside Nigeria, don’t worry as I’ll be putting up whatever was published in the magazine, on this blog the next day (deal?). The last post was published on Sunday and it felt kinda weird seeing my name in print and knowing it wasn’t a mistake lol.

Yup that's my name thurrrr...

Yup that’s my name thurrrr…

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If you know me well enough, you’ll know I am a romantic, a passionate Lagos romantic sef and to make matters worse I now blog about all things love and romance on Inasonki. It caters to lovers in the Lagos metropolitan area looking for things to do and for quick getaways (so for all of you that keep sending me messages on facebook for cosy restaurants and little getaways please refer to Inasonki) …Please subscribe, follow on twitter and like on facebook, let’s celebrate the art of love & romance in Lagos.

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I need everyone to listen to this cover by Jay O Suave, I’m not a huge fan of rap as you know but you can say I am biased on this one because she mixes her flow with a bit of igbo and also because she’s like my lil sis and a fine girl (yup I am famzing for when she blows up)…Anyway download, listen and enjoy :)

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Lastly, I remember blogging about a friend  called Jojo Abot some months back. Well I found some of her stuff that I absolutely love and I recommend you listen to it whether you understand the language or not (’cause I don’t..hehehe)

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Ehen update complete… I promise to come back with gist …

xoxo,

Sheila O

The Next Titan TV Reality show is here!!!

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The Next Titan!! Nigeria’s First Ever Entrepreneurial Reality Show!! 16 Vibrant Contestants, 1 Luxurious Mansion, 1 Winner… WHO WILL BE THE NEXT TITAN? Capture the drama, intrigue and suspense laced with tips and tricks of the business trade. Watch the story unfold as cameras follow these young entrepreneurs around the streets of Lagos as they fight to become the Next Titan. The espionage, betrayal and emotional outbursts will leave you teetering at the edge of your seat as you await each episode from week to week.

Video Link for Sharing and viewing:
The Next Titan Movement Ft Trayciee (Reality Access) #TheNextTitan

Catch The Next Titans on Channels TV Every Saturday at 8pm and ONTV Every Sunday at 6pm!! Don’t Miss It!!

Why are you still single? (WYUSS)

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This my friends is the question I get every time I mention my age in a conversation, like there has to be a supernatural reason why yours truly is not married at a whooping age of 26+ , (27 in July). Any single lady older than I am would probably wonder what I am on about after all I am only a few years to the big 3 0 but it’s the constant reminder that I am close to 30 that even irritates me the more. To make life easier for me, I have decided to compose my very own FAQ for future reference

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Sheila’s WYUSS FAQ

Q: Don’t you want to settle down?

But who doesn’t though? Who willingly admits to loving the idea of being on their own and lonely; a few people may like to lie to themselves about being free and stuff but I don’t, Sista gurl wants to settle down and will settle down at the right time to the right person.

Q: So why don’t you have a boyfriend?

You know I ask God the same question. Maybe because God has a plan and it doesn’t include me having a boyfriend at the moment. On the real though, should there even be a reason why anyone is single? Why is this even a question? Why am I answering this?

Q: Are you domestic enough?

Am I what? Domestic? Odiegwu! Well for the record I am but marriage is not about being domestic or being chained down in the kitchen. It’s much more than that, I am more worried about being spiritually and emotionally sound to be a backbone of my family.

Q: ‘Don’t you want to have your children before you turn 30?’

Actually, I don’t care and if I did want to have kids before 30, I would have them with or without a husband, ok I take that back, I need a husband before kids biko. The point is why worry about having kids before a certain age instead of worrying about your emotional and possible financial ability of taking care of another being. Children are not cheap these days o, have you heard the price of school fees? Well I have!, my friend’s sister just paid $13,000 for her 5-year-old daughter (who would be my friend’s niece) and you don’t want to know how much secondary school is as well. Yes I know there are people on a salary of 50k a month with 5 children living in remote parts of Lagos, but I can’t be using fonetics, speaking a foreign language and my children will now sound like Ajegunle pikin dem. Mbanu! (Nothing against AJ people o, before una attack me)

Q: ‘Like play, you will be 30 o! Stop being picky and realise time is passing’

So because I’m turning 30 soon, I should now settle for any man? The logic behind this time and biological clock is ridiculous. If I’ll be spending more of my lifetime being married than single then please I need to take my time.

Q: But you’re a very nice girl, have you considered looking outside your box, change location or environment? I heard there are men in Canada

And there are men in China, Australia, Nigeria, Sudan, Ethiopia, South Africa, Ireland, USA, UK, Germany, Iceland, Russia, Zimbabwe, Burundi, Ghana….North Korea

Q: So what’s your plan to get a husband?

To live a happy and fulfilled life until he finds me.

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And that’s it folks, my personal ‘Why are you still single FAQ’..I will be referring a lot of people to this link when asked that silly question.

XXX,
Sheila

P.S. I hope you noticed I mentioned my birthday month o, ehen my baiday is July 8. I will be accepting monetary gifts (I will rent a POS machine if I have to)

April 30, 2013 - SheilaSpeaks

Reblogged from the3six5NG:

Click to visit the original post

6:30
Today's declaration is a bit disturbing. Okay maybe not, but for a chronic plan-a-holic, realizing that I am living a life that has been planned out and I cannot change is disturbing. Everything that happens is part of the Master's plan regardless of what my plan is. Today though, like many other days, I'm hoping for a tie between Sheila's plan and the Master's plan.

Read more… 314 more words

My contribution to the3six5ng

Native name debate

As a child, when asked ‘what is your name?’, I would simply answer with Sheila and watch the other person either try to pronounce it, ask for the meaning or say ‘oh what a beautiful name’. Sometimes parents would take note of the name and consider it for their unborn daughters. To me it was my name; it was what I was known by, everyone called me that and not once was my authenticity as a Nigerian questioned because I bore an English name.

Recently, I have noticed the rise of what I would like to call ‘ethnic identity’, where more people want to be identified with their ‘ethnic’ or African side, the natural hair movement, the ethnic attire, the Ankara into everything fashion and most of all the use of the ‘native name’. Don’t get me wrong, I love it but sometimes I find it a bit too much, too forced and somewhat fake. For someone who hasn’t really cared about her first name being in a different language other than her indigenous language, I sometimes feel like my identity is being questioned when I say my name is Sheila instead of using one of my many native names. Nowadays, I am faced with conversations such as:

A: ‘What is your name?’
Me: Sheila
A: What is your local name?
Me: Amaka
A: Ehen! That’s who you are, which one is Sheila abeg? I’m only calling you Amaka joor
Me: Sheila is fine thank you (insert fake smile)

This then leads to a discussion or argument on why choosing to use my ‘first name’ (which is English) makes me less of a Nigerian because I have chosen to identify with ‘ndi ocha’; regardless of the fact that I grew up in Nigeria, speak enu-ani (my dialect) fluently and I’m also in touch with my culture and tradition as an Anioma woman. Explaining that my native name is reserved for those who are really close to me, or letting them know that my parents (who gave me the name) only call me by my first name is sometimes pointless and ends up with me feeling slightly irritated.

The name you choose to answer has nothing to do with where you are from, I have a cousin with a Yoruba name but is from Delta and I once met a Miss Okoro that turned out to be more Jamaican than anything else; yet her parents have one of the strongest Igbo accents you would ever hear. So when faced with such debates, I am forced to ask if it makes me any less of a Nigerian by insisting to be called by my English first name.

As more and more people are getting on this whole ‘true identity, accepting who you really are’ train, someone needs to remind them that it is a choice and not everyone has to do what you do because you consider it to be right, ethnic or Nigerian. I choose to have relaxed hair and to be called by my first name, which happens to be English.

I am a true daughter of Issele-uku, Aniocha North Local Government in Delta State. I love my native music, my favourite soup is ofe-nsala and I love to cook ukpo-oka (corn pudding) with crayfish and wrapped in leaves. My name is Sheila NneAmaka Nkemdilim Ifeliochukwu Chidinma Ojei but my preferred name is Sheila

If you have any problems, please remember it is my name, my choice and not yours.

:)

 

Rocking the oleku look as a naturalised yoruba chic

 

Desiderata by Max Ehrmann

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Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all people. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to all even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive people, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself to others you will become vain and bitter; there will always be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs; for the world is full of trickery. But let not this blind you to the virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals; and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; You have the right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive God to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, It is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Please help me help Mrs Hazel

 

Dear God’s Select,

I am writing this mail to you with heavy tears In my eyes and great sorrow in my heart, My Name is Mrs Larry Hazel, and I am contacting you from my country Tunisia I want to tell you this because I don’t have any other option than to tell you as I was touched to open up to you, I married to Mr. Daisy Brown who worked with Tunisia embassy in Burkina Faso for nine years before he died in the year 2005.We were married for eleven years without a child.

He died after a brief illness that lasted for only five days. Since his death I decided not to remarry, When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of US$ 8.5m (Eight Million Five hundred Thousand Dollars) in a bank in Ouagadougou the capital city of Burkina Faso in west Africa Presently this money is still in bank. He made this money available for exportation of Gold from Burkina Faso mining.

Recently, My Doctor told me that I would not last for the period of seven months due to cancer problem. The one that disturbs me most is my stroke sickness.Having known my condition I decided to hand you over this money to take care of the less-privileged people, you will utilize this money the way I am going to instruct herein.

I want you to take 30 Percent of the total money for your personal use While 70% of the money will go to charity, people in the street and helping the orphanage. I grew up as an Orphan and I don’t have any body as my family member, just to end eavour that the house of God is maintained. Am doing this so that God will forgive my sins and accept my soul because these sicknesses have suffered me so much.

As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the bank in Burkina Faso and I will also instruct the Bank Manger to issue you an authority letter that will prove you the present beneficiary of the money in the bank that is if you assure me that you will act accordingly as I Stated herein.

Always reply to my alternative for security purposes

Hoping to receive your reply:

From Mrs Larry Hazel

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Well I got this in my mailbox this fabulous monday morning

Notice the typos and wrong spellings, Do people still fall for this?..anyway have a fab week ahead and on that note, na who born the Maga?

Love,

Sheila

SheilaSpeaks invites you to REJOICE 2013!

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If you’ve known my blog long enough, you’ll know I am a PK (no omo pastor jokes accepted) but I hardly blog about church and church events..ok I never, except something funny happens.

Anyway today I am inviting you to our annual All-night worship event tagged REJOICE on the 28th of March (4 days from today)…this is the 12th year of having this event and it’s really a wonderful experience…i’m not being biased I promise.

So you are very invited and errm feel free to come say hi to me if you do show up :) ..

Luv ya,

Sheila